Eco Spirits: Gotta Fail Em All

There’s something really familiar about Eco Spirits, but I just can’t put my finger on it. Its would-be developers haven’t made a kickstarter before, but I feel as though I’ve already played their game. Let’s take a look through their pitch, and you can leave a comment if you figure out the game I’m trying to think of.

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Laika Believes (In A Thing Called Fail)

Video games are made about everything these days. Sure, there’s your run of the mill Carl on Duty: Black Cops and your World of Zombies Online Shooter McGavin, but the real innovation, of course, lies in the indie game scene. Where else could you find a game about.. oh, I don’t know, a bunch of Russians murdering a dog?

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You can find it at Minicore Studios, the shitlords behind the widely-ignored Laika Believes: The Sun at Night.

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Failure of Existence

You are about to embark on a journey. A journey through this blog post. You will question everything you thought you knew about reading. You will read more words than you ever imagined could exist. All of your hopes and dreams lie just beyond the cut.
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Jordan Gerber Goes for the Kickstarter Fail Hat Trick

Have you ever seen one of those kids who really wants to be a part of the “cool kids” group, so they mimic whatever those kids are doing, but gets it horribly wrong every time in brand new, embarrassing ways? If you have, you’ll be excited to know that this post is about the Kickstarter version of that kid.

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If you haven’t, welcome to failure funtimes.

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Angry Shouty Rant: Early Access (Part 2)

Last time on Angry Shouty Rant, I had my disagreements with Jim Sterling’s video criticizing Steam’s Early Access. It’s not that I don’t believe that there are issues with Early Access, I just think that Jim’s specific issues with it were complete nonsense.

To sum up, Jim believes that Early Access is often used as an excuse to release an incomplete, buggy mess, and charge for a full release. As a game journalist, I expect him to know what to expect from an Alpha or Beta version of a game, and as a gamer, I’d expect him to understand the value of acquiring such a (until now) rare piece of software. Either not understanding these things or pretending not to, Jim snarks his way through nearly 8 minutes of hating the fact that these in-development games don’t give him a full gameplay experience.

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This is fine, because I already didn’t like Jim Sterling. I think (at least lately) that he has a bunch of stupid opinions, and flaunts them as if they are revolutionary ideas. And though I’ve also had my disagreements with YouTube’s TotalBiscuit, I still have a hell of a lot of respect for him. And so it breaks my heart to tell you that TB’s problem with Early Access is even more facepalmingly stupid.

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Angry Shouty Rant: Early Access (Part 1)

If there’s one thing that I’ve learned this week, it’s that British people hate Steam’s Early Access.

And just like the last Angry Shouty Rant, we go right to none other than Escapist darling Jim Sterling.

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Hating on something Jim Sterling writes is a lot easier than hating on one of his videos; the accent, the Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous tone, and of course the patented British snark all come together to make something easily likable. Unfortunately, Jim’s vapid excuse for content has removed the wool from my eyes, and it’s gotten to the point where I groan in annoyance before he even begins. The target for his attempt at relevant dialogue this time was Steam’s Early Access.

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The First Annual 2013 Gaames Awards

Cue the jazzy intro music, it’s time for the 2013 Gaames Awards! Rather than a “top” list, I figured I would make it more of a generic award sort of thing, more to call out notables games for very specific reasons. So let’s get right to it.

Most Adventerous: Brothers – A Tale of Two Sons

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As I mentioned in my review, Brothers was an epic journey. More than any other game I’ve played – probably ever – it embodied adventure. The linear path you travel does nothing to hinder the feeling of traversing a huge, varied world. And although it didn’t make me all teary-eyed, it was an incredibly memorable experience, and easily one of the best games I played this year. So I had to give it some kind of award, and the aspect of adventure was what stood out to me.

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Kill Fucking Confirmed: The Novelist

I am all over the damn place with this blog lately. Haven’t even done my 2013 GOTY and I’m already one shitty Kickstarter and one finished game down. I’m not looking at Kickstarter until I write the GOTY post, and I’ll try not to finish any other games. The latter shouldn’t be too hard, considering how awful I generally am at it. But that didn’t stop me from completing the 2 hours it took for one playthrough of The Novelist.

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Aqua Arcade is Drowning in Bullshit

Few things could be less surprising than the fact that Aqua Arcade is about to fail. But predictable or not, I think it’s worth talking about. And by talking about, I mean talking shit about.

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Kill Fucking Confirmed: Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons

Unless I finish another game today (incredibly unlikely), this marks the third and final game that I have finished this year. And yes, each of them took under 5 hours to complete. It’s not that I have no attention span; it just somehow holds my interest more to play the same 20 Trackmania Canyon tracks for hours on end, or gather and craft in an MMO indefinitely than it does to complete a storyline in a standard single-player game. So let’s talk about Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons, shall we?

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